The Random Tales of Remnant
by WangthePhoenix
Summary: I got bored and wrote a fan fiction. Just some random stories with no real connection with each other, taking place in the RWBY universe. This will be my first fan fiction.


**Marshmallow Flakes**

Ren was spending some alone time in the JNPR dorms. He peacefully sat on the edge of his bed as he rifled through his book of martial arts techniques. These calm moments had always been few and far between, being a hunter in training and friends with Nora didn't help matters.

As if on cue, a loud _BANG_ issued throughout the room as the dorm's door was nearly kicked off its hinges to make way for a huge pile of orange boxes, stacked precisely so that they would just barely fit through the frame. Ren sighed internally. So much for the peace, he thought as he noted the pink and white pair of shoes barely showing from behind the box tower.

Ren spoke, "Hey, Nora." Bits of plaster showered down from the wall next to the door.

"Ooh, hey Ren!" replied a muffled voice, "I didn't expect for you to be here! Actually… why wouldn't you be here, this is our dorm after all, amirite? Anyways, could you help me with the rest of those boxes? Kinda got my arms full here."

After Nora made way, Ren stepped outside the damaged door frame to see five more perfectly arranged mountains of boxes, sitting right in the middle of the hallway. He briefly wondered how Nora had carried all these boxes here, but then dismissed the question. He had often seen the Valkyrie perform greater stunts. Careful not to destabilize the box tower, he reached his arms around the sides and lifted the boxes. He estimated about eighty pounds worth of whatever the boxes contained, and carried them inside.

Two more trips outside the dorm later, Ren and Nora had created a Mt. Everest of boxes, taller than both of them combined, in the middle of the room. Ren pulled a box from the side of the pile, causing a mini avalanche to slide down onto the floor. The box read, " _Pumpkin Pete's: Marshmallow Flakes,"_ and sported Pyrrha's face on the cover.

"I thought you were more of a pancake person," said Ren, raising his eyebrows at his friend.

"Oh no, I'm not eating them," Nora pointed at a corner on the cover, "Now with Pyrrha figurines! Collect them all!" she read.

Ren blankly stared at the rest of the boxes. Nora tended to go too far with a lot of things, so much so that he had come to expect it, but judging by the gigantic pile of boxes in the center of the room, this was definitely a new _far out_. About a second of internal meditation later, he asked, "Why would you need this many figurines?"

"I'm starting a collection!" she exclaimed.

She punched her fist through a box, spraying its sweet, flakey contents all over the beds and carpet. With a triumphant look on her face, pulled out a plastic figurine that resembled Pyrrha but with a large head and exaggerated facial features. The box was dropped, all remaining cereal crumbs bleeding from holes on both sides and out onto the floor.

"Isn't she cute!" Nora nuzzled her prize against her cheek.

Ren emanated a slightly disapproving silence.

"They also double as fridge magnets," she offered, "Here, look."

She stuck the base of the figurine against the closest metallic thing she saw, the edge of Jaune's scroll, and, in the process, probably erased all the memory from the important device. Ren placed his forehead in his palm and let a small smile spread across his passive face. He couldn't help but find this situation funny. Seeing Ren smile, Nora perked up again. Ren looked back up just in time for fourteen ounces of balanced breakfast to collide with his face.

"It's time for the cereal war!" Nora yelled. She was enjoying herself immensely as she rapidly disemboweled the cereal boxes and stacked the figurines into a perfect Pyrrha-mid on the desk. Ren's smile of amusement transformed into a grin of challenge. He compacted together the contents of three cereal boxes and launched them towards Nora's laughing face, catching her with a mouthful of cereal. Nora sputtered as she coughed out all the pieces.

Nora darkened for a second, "Oh, it's on now."

Ren braced himself.

And thus begun the battle of Dorm 6, Beacon Academy. Nora threw handful upon handful of high-velocity chips that had enough force to spell disaster had Ren not been as good an aura user as he was. Cereal crumbs embedded themselves into the walls and floor. The rug was covered with layers and layers of sweet fragments until it resembled no more than a pile of chipped spikes.

Ren retaliated by channeling his aura to blast open boxes as he sent waves of aura-infused flakes at Nora who only barely managed to keep the chips out of her face with near-constant brushing. Blizzards of hardened flakes tore at the curtains and punched holes through the window. Nora ducked behind the central pile and gathering herself and eight more boxes. She peeked out from behind the pile to send all eight of the still-in-the-box cereals in Ren's direction. Some of them buried themselves into the beds behind, but a few hit their mark and exploded in contact with him, knocking him onto his feet. Nora perched herself on top of the pile and laughed, having the time of her live. Ren recovered quickly, flinging himself back upright. Not giving Nora another moment to enjoy her brief victory, he continued his onslaught at full strength, sweeping Nora off her throne.

As the two of them grabbed at more cereal boxes to fuel their ammo needs, the pile in the center of the room grew smaller and smaller until there were only eight boxes left. Each of them managed to snatch away half. Ren poised himself with two boxes in each hand, channeling the last of his aura into them as Nora sent her arm through four boxes in a row. They prepared themselves to fight again when…

Pyrrha stepped in through the door.

At first, she walked calmly and casually. As she neared the center of the room, however, she finally began to register her surroundings.

The entire room was covered in a centimeter-layer of cereal and cardboard dust. The previously well-maintained rug had been reduced to a shredded, spiky mat. Bits of cereal drifted off the ceiling and sprinkled off the shredded wallpaper. The curtains were torn, the windows were shattered, the bed sheets were nowhere to be seen, and the pillows were cut, exposing the stuffings.

Ren and Nora had not moved since Pyrrha had entered the room. They seemed to be frozen in position. The four boxes in Ren's hands which were meant to detonate only emitted fizzing and popping sounds, as the aura supply was suddenly cut off. Ren's expression was that of awkward indifference. Nora had froze mid-laugh. Her mouth held open and her arm was raised in the air as the four boxes ringed around it spilled cereal onto the floor.

Pyrrha closed her eyes and slowly, _slowly_ opened them again. She stared at the perfectly clean desk in the center of the room. An army of Pyrrha figurines stared back. Finally, Pyrrha moved. Her finger twitched a little and she stepped backwards, excruciatingly slowly. Without even looking behind her, she somehow perfectly retraced the footprints in the freshly distributed dust as she stepped all the way out the door. She pivoted ninety degrees, kicking out her free leg as she turned, stood for a few seconds, and broke into a headlong sprint down the hallway, leaving a cloud of cereal dust behind her.

Nora finally seemed to thaw out. "Aww, where's Pyrrha off to so quickly?" she inquired out loud.

"I bet it a party," she decided.

"Sure," Ren replied.

Jaune poked his head from behind the door.

"Hey guys, do you know where PyrrraaAAHH…" His voice trailed off as he was greeted with the exact same scene the very person he was inquiring about had seen not a moment before.

His face paled with shock. He blinked, sputtered, blinked again, tried to stutter a few words, failed, and blinked one more time before he managed to be remotely coherent.

"I-I'll, uh… *ahem* show myself out…" He pivoted ninety degrees in a similar fashion to Pyrrha, kicking his free leg out as he spun around and launched off in the same direction of his teammate.

Nora bolted out the door after him.

"Wait, Jaune," she shouted, "At least tell me where the party's at!"

Ren relaxed as the room finally emptied. He excavated his book from under the mound of cereal he was standing in, brushed off a square foot of space at the side of his bed, and sat down. The last few chips of cereal dislodging themselves from his hair as he turned the pages.


End file.
